Why have you left me in all this darkness, which scares my soul out.

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Why have you left me in all this darkness, which scares my soul out. Why did you promise me a love never ending, and then left. 
It haunts me, that my teenage without you is now just another worthless wait. I won't fall in love with somebody else like you will, i won't kiss anyone without thinking of how your lips tasted. Everytime i would hug someone i will crave the warmth of your body. Every time somebody would ask me if i've had lunch, i'll miss how you scolded me for skipping. Everytime i'll walk in the park, the trees will remind me of you. Everytime i will miss you, somebody will kiss you. I wish i was still clean of your scars, your smiles and my scars somehow resemble, everytime you'll drown in his chest laughing so hard that your stomach would hurt, my heart will drown. But am i not so strong? I don't let my tears out infront of you. I don't complain of how low you've treated me. How somebody will kiss your entire neck and i'll be dying of imagining you in that night. What if i had done that to you? But thats alright. I smoke countless joints, and drink more alcohol, i'm not committing myself to a slow suicide, 
It's that what used to kill me in my head before these drugs, comes right in front of me, under the alcohol i see you right in front of me, i sit right there, and smile wondering how beautifully you destroyed me. 
You'll always be the reason behind my smile//I will miss you my entire life.

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